Guilt-Free Ways to Say ‘No’

Guilt-Free Ways to Say ‘No’

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tape over mouth“No, is a complete sentence.”

That is best statement I’ve heard in a long time. Those two little letters have a lot of power in your life.  If you are a entrepreneur than I am sure people depend on you. And, sometimes you may find yourself saying, ‘yes’ to them when you really want to say no. Sometimes you’ll let the words, ‘I’ll try’ slip out,  when you rather say, ‘absolutely not.” And sometimes you’ll mumble, ‘can I let you know?’ when  you really want to say, ‘have you lost you ever-loving mind?”

Entrepreneurs and especially solopreneurs are A-type personalities. We don’t want to disappoint or have people think less of us. We like being the hero, the person that comes through. The problem doing that all the time is we end up stretching ourselves thin, leaving no time for ourselves.

You have a lot on your plate and need to feel comfortable prioritizing your time. It is absolutely acceptable to turn down a request, if you do not want to do it. After all, if you try to focus on everything; you won’t be able to do anything effectively.

No, is one of the most powerful words in your vocabulary (ask any two year-old). Here are a few tips to help you use it like a pro:

Don’t feel Bad:

If the idea of saying ‘Yes’ to something makes you cringe or you get a lump in the pit of your stomach, you should say ‘no’.  Saying ‘yes’ is an affirmation of your mind and body that you are in agreement with the request and doing the request brings you (and not just the person asking) some sort of satisfaction. If you doubt saying ‘yes’ for even a moment, then you should trust your gut and say, ‘no.’

Know Who You Are Trying To Please:

Sometimes the idea of saying ‘no’ makes us feel guilty, so we decide to say ‘yes.’ This usually stems from some desire to not make the person asking upset or think less of you. So, you let yourself feel bad in order to have them feel good.  This “disease to please” can become a never ending cycle and only you have the power to stop it. If your intentions are to keep them from becoming upset then you will succeed at the cost of your own comfort and time. Only say ‘yes’ if you truly want to help and you feel happy to do it.

Say ‘No’ the right way:

Say ‘no’ with enthusiasm and skip the excuses. Excuses leave the other person room to come up with work arounds for you to get their request done. Remember, ‘no’ is a complete sentence. Practice saying it. If you don’t want to sound too harsh, practice saying it with a smile. You don’t have to deliver the ‘no’ in a negative tone or with a frown for it to be effective.

Don’t Apologize:

Avoid, using the words, “I’m sorry” when you decline a request. Let’s be real. You’re not sorry. You just don’t want the person asking to think you are being mean or dismissive. Be confident when you say ‘no.’ Saying ‘no’ is a choice just as asking a request or favor is a choice. You shouldn’t apologize for making the choice you feel is right for you.

I’m not suggesting that you go around saying ‘no’ to every request in your life, but you should only say ‘yes’ when it feels right. Saying ‘no,’ doesn’t make you a bad person. Saying ‘no’ when you mean it opens opportunities to do more of the things that make you smile when people ask.

à bientôt

 

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